Andrade Cien Almas & Zelina defeated Rusev & Lana
3.75/10
- Aiden English is told to stay behind when he offers up a song to Rusev & Lana.
- I liked the conversation of mixing business, pleasure, and emotion as it relates to these two teams.
- Lana gets a hot tag and it's not good at all. Eventually she pulls it together and gets some nice offense.
- Zelina gets the win with her foot on the ropes.
- This was not good at all.
WWE Cruiserweight Championship
Cedric Alexander (c) defeated Drew Gulak
5.5/10
- This wasn't quite on par with most 205 Live main events for me. The crowd didn't help. They just don't know about these guys.
- The transitions and escapes in and out of the GuLock were the highlight.
- There were some great reversals towards the end, but a botched cradle really took me out of it. This was them rolling around until someone scored a pin. The botch was really, really bad.
Raw Tag Team Championships
B-Team (c) defeated The Revival
5/10
- Curtis Axel gets Shatter Machine'd right out of the gate and Bo Dallas is on his own.
- It is really hard for the crowd to get behind Dallas and Axel after years of losing, a year of being cronies, then banana peel wins, then all of a sudden hanging with every team on Raw.
- Dallas gets the Au Revoir and hot tags Axel to no reaction.
- Dawson has Bo pinned, but we get another banana peel win when the tides are turned. Didn't I pitch a banana peel win gimmick for Bo Dallas months ago on the podcast? If so, I'm sorry.
WWE Intercontinental Championship
Seth Rollins (w/ Dean Ambrose) defeated Dolph Ziggler (c) (w/ Drew McIntyre) to win the title
7/10
- I love Ziggler's IC Title gear. Ambrose's new look works much better for him too.
- Ambrose stares down McIntyre, which is a nice touch.
- The first big spot of the match is Rollins catching Ziggler off the top rope, and trying to Falcon Arrow him, but both tumbling over the top rope.
- We don't need an extended chinlock on a card this length. We do need the Ziggler DDT on the apron though.
- Rollins eats knees on a frog splash attempt after a superkick. That's a hearty spot.
- An INVERTED SUPERPLEX to Bloody Sunday! One of the best spots of the weekend.
- McIntyre attacks Ambrose, which distracts Rollins into taking a Zig Zag. Rollins is busted open!
- Ambrose attacks McIntyre, Rollins superkicks and Stomps Ziggler for the win!
Backstage Crappenings
- Bellas are here and focused on (all the shit they're doing). I don't want to see Nikki face Rousey. WWE. Do not book Nikki Bella in the main event of WWE Evolution. This is a bad idea. It is not a good idea. The promo wasn't even a good idea. They're gonna watch Rousey's match front row.
- Elias tries to perform, but his guitar breaks and the crowd chants "you fucked up."
- Miz heels the B-Team backstage.
Smackdown Tag Team Championships
New Day (w/ Kofi Kingston) defeated Bludgeon Brothers (c) via DQ, no title change
7/10
- Bludgeon Brothers totally kill Xavier, until he huracanranas one on the stairs.
- Big E gets in after a hot tag, and the crowd is jumping. A Harper Michinoku Driver stops Big E.
- Xavier gets murdered with a Bossman Slam outside the ring and a powerbomb party inside the ring.
- Rowan does a heaving back body drop to Kofi, just to be a jerk.
- Xavier with a flying elbow drop to the floor!!! We also see a uranage/backstabber off the apron!
- I did not have New Day and Bludgeon Brothers marked down for possibly stealing the show.
- Rowan and Harper attack with their hammers for the DQ!
- I'm glad we're in the day and age where we get one dq/countout finish on a show instead of the 5-6 like way back when.
Money in the Bank Briefcase
Braun Strowman squashes Kevin Owens
- Kevin Owens gets SQUASHED. He has a KO in the Bank shirt, which is a swerve.
- Runned over, chokeslammed through the table, powerslam.
- If I'm KO's character, I hatch a plan to help Braun win the title under the agreement that he get the first shot.
Smackdown Women's Championship
Charlotte Flair defeated Becky Lynch and Carmella (c) to win the title
6.25/10
- Everyone having new gear sets this off. It makes it seem like the special show it is.
- Carmella keeps interjecting herself and finally interrupts Becky and throws her into the stairs HARD.
- Boot misses Becky -- even accidentally -- by a mile from Charlotte.
- Becky gets a burst of offense, but is caught with Stratusphere from Carmella.
- Charlotte spears Carmella while the latter does a Flatliner to Becky, but it's mistimed. This is rough.
- Charlotte reversed the Stratusphere into a Boston Crab slam, then a Boston Crab into a Figure 8. Becky breaks up the pin with a flying leg drop.
- Carmella totally STUCK a suicide dive, but she and Becky had to wait forever for Charlotte to come off the top rope with her amazing dive. Unfortunately, it missed Becky altogether.
- Disarmher on Charlotte, but Carmella breaks it up. A nice inverted pumphandle slam for Becky gets broken up by Carmella too. Carmella then gets to the ropes on a Disarmher.
- Charlotte lands Natural Selection on Becky Lynch while the Disarmher is applied and wins.
- This would have hit 7/10 easily if not for the bad timing early on.
- Becky Lynch turns on Charlotte after the match, and beats her ass. This HAD to happen.
WWE Championship
Samoa Joe defeated AJ Styles (c) via DQ, no title change
8/10
- The match starts off with.....a headlock after Joe introduces Styles' wife at ringside.
- I can't remember seeing a Styles match start off at a high pace in recent years. We also see a lot of the same spots as their TNA days.
- Joe hitting a Flying Leg Lariat certainly isn't one of those familiar spots.
- AJ hits a Styles Clash for two, but Graves explaining that both arms weren't hooked saved Joe was a great touch.
- Calf Crusher gets reversed into a Coquina Clutch, but Styles gets to the ropes.
- Joe kicks Styles off the top rope and sends him into the stairs HARD. Joe tells Wendy he'll be their new daddy, because AJ isn't coming home.
- AJ FLIPS OUT and kills Joe through the barricade, then attacks him with a chair for the DQ, and beats up workers ringside.
- Not big on DQ finishes, but damn, this was great storytelling. AJ went banana.
The Miz defeated Daniel Bryan
8.25/10
- I hope Marjo interferes and fights Daniel Bryan. Maryse is ringside.
- Sweet Seahawks gear for Daniel Bryan. Sweet.
- This is a WrestleMania match.
- Bryan and Miz are potatoing the shiznit out of each other. Bryan lays in some kicks.
- Miz does an inverted surfboard, but Bryan gets out and does one of his own!
- Bryan takes a nasty tope rope clothesline that turns him inside out! Miz follows up with a kravate and knees.
- Miz tries to do Bryan's dropkicks, but eats offense instead. A suicide dropkick with high velocity from Bryan, as well as a diving body press to the outside are among those.
- I rarely see a good tree of woe. Tonight I did.
- GREAT facial expressions from Miz when Bryan no sells his Yes Kicks and slaps him.
- Catapult into Skull Crushing Finale, but Miz gets a 2!
- Bryan kicks Miz on the apron, but kicks the ring post HARD. Figure four applied by the Miz. Bryan punches his way out and reverses pressure.
- After a couple of nearfalls, Bryan cracks huge elbows and applies the Yes Lock.
- Maryse hands Miz brass knuckles ringside. He busts Bryan with them and gets the pin!
- Bryan isn't happy backstage in the trainer's room and tells Brie he should have known better.
Demon Balor defeated Constable Corbin
SQUASH
- We get a surprise Demon appearance. Cool. This should be a squash.
- Corbin doesn't wanna fight. He gets his ass kicked accordingly. There's still smoke outside after a Balor dive.
- Balor's offense looks way more cool when he doesn't look like Irish Fonzie.
- It was a squash.
United States Championship
Shinsuke Nakamura (c) defeated Jeff Hardy
5.5/10
- Nakamura is HILARIOUS. Jeff Hardy mocks him and Nakamura is beside himself. Nakamura has great continuity in being the troll who can't take what he dishes out.
- I don't know if we needed an hour number five modified cobra clutch for two minutes.
- Some back and forth, but Nakamura gets caught swinging for the BALLS.
- Twist of Fate and a Swanton, but Nakamura grabs the ropes. Dead crowd here. Hardy follows up with a nasty Twist of Fate.
- Hardy misses a horrifying Swanton to the apron! Nakamura with the Kinshasa for the win.
- Randy Orton comes out, then turns right back around. K.
RAW Women's Championship
Ronda Rousey defeated Alexa Bliss (c) to become champion
SQUASH
- Alexa Bliss has already lasted longer against Ronda Rousey than Sara McMann, Bethe Correia, Cat Zingano and Alexis Davis combined.
- Bliss repeatedly powders out. Rousey gives Bliss the ring and allows a chinlock to be applied, which she turns into her Samoan drop.
- Bliss knees Rousey, and the latter is in disbelief. Rousey flips Bliss backwards, then asks "YOU READY?" before a big judo throw.
- Tap tap taparoo for Bliss. Rousey is the new women's champion.
- Ronda Rousey is WWE Raw Women's Champion. She's the first woman to hold UFC and WWE titles.
- Natalya and the Bellas celebrate with Rousey. Gotta get that Total Divas footage.
WWE Universal Championship
Roman Reigns defeated Brock Lesnar (c) (w/ Paul Heyman) to become champion
- BRAUN STROWMAN comes out and says he's gonna cash in immediately after. HUGE ovation.
- Roman Reigns gets three Superman punches and three spears, but gets caught in a guillotine. He spinebusters his way out.
- Man, I wanted to see Strowman/Lesnar/Reigns in a then now forever hoss battle god war. German Suplexes from Lesnar lead to a "you both suck" chant.
- "It's not about the WWE Universe" is so indicative of the booking.
- Reigns goes after Lesnar but suicide dives Strowman. Lesnar F5s Strowman! Lesnar beats Strowman down with the case!
- Brock Lesnar just broke the damn Summerslam set from about 75 feet away with a freaking briefcase.
- Spear. Reigns wins! The era of Brock Lesnar is finally over. Mercifully.
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