BUTT MUD
- Paul Heyman comes out with Roman Reigns. Paul Heyman introduces Jey Uso.
- Uso thanks Heyman and says he goes way back with his family.
- In case you didn't know, Jey Uso's father, Fatu (Rikishi) was managed by Paul Heyman 30 years ago. That's what Uso meant when he referenced Heyman and his family going way back.
- Heyman credits Roman Reigns for the spot.
- Reigns says he's going to beat Jey's ass, and things will be fine with them. Uso agrees with the competitive spirit.
- Baron Corbin and Sheamus each come out and complain about a CONSPIRACY.
- Blood vs. Butt mud. This is stupid. Uso beats them both up. He wants a tag team match.
Intercontinental Title Match
AJ Styles defeated Jeff Hardy (c) via DQ. Hardy retains
5/10
- Sami Zayn is mad this is an IC Title match. Adam Pearce kicks out Sami Zayn
- Going to a commercial right after a Twist of Fate and missed Swanton is super odd.
- Hardy hits a Whisper in the Wind after they brawl outside.
- Sami Zayn attacks and causes a DQ.
- Jeff Hardy collapses after the match.
- AJ Styles says he can beat either of them and doesn't care when, where, how or what match.
- Sami goes into the trainer's room to troll a dehydrated Jeff Hardy and gets attacked.
Lucha House Party defeated Shinsuke Nakamura & Cesaro
4.5/10
- Street Profits are on Smackdown and troll the champs.
- Lucha House Party have a pep talk and do their dumb chant.
- Nothing makes me wanna see champions face each other like one of them losing I tell ya whut!
- That's what happens when Street Profits pop up on the Titan Tron distracting Cesaro & Nakamura. They're having a PARTY, man.
- This was stupid and made the champions look bad. These guys, these champions are SO GOOD that they get distracted by the video wall and lose! Tune in Monday!
- An otherwise good match ruined by a dumb finish.
- Lucha House Party join the party after.
Bayley
- Bayley comes and puts a chair in the ring and throws to a video.
- Bayley is happy she turned on her best friend.
- She knows Sasha Banks was waiting for the right time to turn on her, because she was doing the same thing. She was using Sasha Banks too.
- Bayley's promo was very good here.
Top Contender Match
Nikki Cross defeated Tamina, Lacey Evans and Alexa Bliss
4/10
- No Naomi here, but I won't rush to judgment.
- Nikki Cross gets attacked by Bayley with a chair. She wants to continue.
- Tamina is still not very good. She shows up and just competes in top contender matches.
- This is a bit messy.
- Lacey Evans' verbal selling is very funny.
- Nikki is back.
- Alexa Bliss does Sister Abigail on Nikki Cross....and they go to commercial. What?
- Alexa Bliss walks off in a trance.
- This match is sloooooooooooooooow. Lacey and Tamina were probably not the best call to carry this one.
- Nikki comes back, and she tries. Boy, does she try. Fortunately, she picks up the win. She did the Au Revior version of The Purge.
- Eventually she rolls up Tamina and wins.
- Bayley has faced all of these women way too much, but at least the Nikki match will be good.
Otis (w/ Tucker) defeated John Morrison (w/ Miz)
4.75/10
- This is Otis' tenth match with Miz or Morrison this year. 10 of this last 15 matches. Why anyone else?
- Otis dancing in response to getting kicked by Morrison is dumb
- Morrison almost dies on an Otis suplex. Sorry, that's gotta go.
- Miz steals Otis' lunchbox.
- Otis wins with the Caterpillar and the Vader Bomb.
- Miz realizes he doesn't have the contract. He was going to try to have it transferred to him.
- Otis had another lunchbox inside the briefcase with the contract.
Firefly Funhouse
- The fake Vince puppet shows up and goes off on Bray and threatens to fire him.
- Wobbly Walrus, a Paul Heyman-esque puppet, shows up as a special advisor.
- "Such good shit!"
Roman Reigns & Jey Uso defeated Sheamus & King Corbin
5.5/10
- Jey is out there without Roman Reigns so far.
- Corbin and Sheamus are really working Uso over.
- Reigns' music hits and causes a big distraction.
- Reigns quietly tags himself in.
- After a big splash by Uso, he spears Sheamus for the win.
- Roman Reigns has adopted what I call McGregor Standard Time.
Rating Guide
10- Perfect, 9- MOTY Territory, 8- Excellent, 7- Great, 6- Good, 5- Average to above average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system. A standard, non-offensive "TV match" lands at a 5. The gap between 5.75-6 is generally the largest, with anything reaching 6 being recommended viewing.
These are opinions, and incredibly inconsistent ones that may change upon a second viewing, or sitting on the match for a period of time. Don't take them too seriously, and have (and share) your own!
