Rating guide
10- Perfect, 9- Excellent, 8- Great, 7- Good, 6- Above Average, 5- Average, 4- Slightly below average, 3 or below: Poor
Each match starts at a 5 and slides up and down based on entertainment, execution, time, environment, reaction and stakes. The ratings are in no way an indication of a "star rating," which is a completely different system.
Pre-Show
- Charly Caruso spots pancakes in a trash bag Kevin Owens is carrying. Owens was outstanding here.
- We hear from Daniel Bryan, Seth Rollins, and Samoa Joe. Kevin Owens tries to talk to Joe about teaming up, but Joe is really confrontational.
- The glare that Booker T shot at the one doofus screaming "CM Punk" was great.
- Owens takes New Day a bunch of pancakes, trying to find out who is in the match tonight. New Day are mad that he likes other breakfast foods. Owens says IHOP was right to change. They steal his syrup.
Smackdown Live Tag Team Championships
Bludgeon Brothers (c) defeated The Good Brothers
5.5/10
- The green gear works a lot better for the Bludgeon Brothers. Anderson and Gallows in black and blue seems different too.
- Harper is tied up in the ropes and is hampered. It doesn't stop BB from destroying Anderson and Gallows outside the ring.
- Anderson just gets worked over hard for several minutes until he hits a spinebuster. Gallows reappears for the hot tag.
- This is the best shape I've ever seen Gallows in. They clear the ring, but Harper cracks Gallows with a boot.
- The Good Brothers are over in Chicago.
- Gallows and Anderson go for the Magic Killer, but it's stopped and Gallows is hit with a Bludgeon Bomb to end it.
Daniel Bryan defeated Big Cass
7.25/10
- Bryan is running circles around Cass. Phillips puts over his heel hook as putting Cass on the shelf for two weeks.
- DB takes a nice Flair bump over the buckles and then hits the barricade.
- Cass goes to the Diesel pose a lot.
- Bryan flipping and leapfrogging Cass is kind of impressive, as is Cass' East River Crossing.
- DB works over the leg and knee of Cass. Commentators used to never mention how hard the apron area is, now they can't stop.
- Cass and Bryan knocked it out of the park with that tilt-a-whirl spot. That was awesome! Cass gets to the ropes after a Yes Lock.
- Bryan flies outside the ring onto Cass! Back in the ring Cass flings Bryan across the ring with a super fallaway slam.
- A torture rack and a goddamn Burning Hammer from Cass. Cass is looking great tonight.
- Bryan gets the Yes kicks, and Cass hits the big boot but can't beat Bryan!
- Big knee and a heel hook! Cass taps!!
Bobby Lashley defeated Sami Zayn
4.5/10
- Zayn hits Lashley with a Helluva kick variation and some crossface punches.
- Lashley flattens Zayn with a spinebuster and does a Canadian backbreaker, then a hanging suplex.
- ....Another Canadian Backbreaker and hanging suplex wins it.
- It's pretty clear when a character has fallen flat, and when someone really needs a change. Lashley fits the bill. He needs a change.
- Not quite sure why Lashley went back to the Canadian Backbreaker and stalling suplex right after he did that exact sequence of moves, but it happened.
- Execution, everything went fine. The weird ending took away.
WWE Intercontinental Championship
Seth Rollins (c) defeated Elias
6.75/10
- Ready for the start of a 455 day Elias Intercontinental Championship reign.
- The crowd chants "we are scumbags." Both of these guys are over.
- Elias clotheslines Rollins on the apron, and Rollins takes it on his head. He's also planted with a DDT for two.
- Rollins does a suicide dive, and Elias doesn't catch him very well. Inside the ring Rollins tweaks his knee on a springboard attempt and catches a knee from Elias for 2.
- If I'm WWE, I have everyone but Ember take the suicide dive out of their regular arsenal.
- Rollins eats knees on a frog splash attempt, but comes back with the Superplex Falcon Arrow combo for two!
- Rollins misses the stop and suicide dive and Elias runs him into a post and stairs. Elbow drop from the top gets two. Elias' pace was great.
- Coach bringing up the championship mentality was great.
- A great series of counters and pins ends in Rollins rolling up Elias for the pin, and Rollins held the tights.
- Constable Corbin finna overturn this? Maybe tomorrow
Women's Money in the Bank
Alexa Bliss defeated Charlotte Flair, Becky Lynch, Naomi, Natalya, Lana, Sasha Banks and Ember Moon
7.25/10
- Lana's entrance is so babyface.
- Ember Moon takes over early. She's so natural. Boys and girls, one day I'm gonna get an Ember Moon/Bianca Belair program and I'll hug the world.
- Ember does a great springboard cross body onto Sasha and the ladder. Beautiful. She walks into an X Factor from Lana on a ladder.
- Natalya slams Lana, then atomic whips Naomi onto the ladder too.
- Charlotte's kicks are a so awkward. While she and Becky hold a ladder, Naomi jumps off it and takes out Natalya, then kicks the ladder into Charlotte and Becky. Naomi dives onto Alexa, then Blockbusters Sasha off the apron.
- Becky tries to climb a ladder that Naomi and Ember are holding and gets cracked with it instead.
- Naomi landing those Speedball Kicks about as well as the Black Mass hit last night.
- This match has already had several spots I'd never even seen before after probably about 150 ladder matches. That includes Sasha doing the corner knees on a ladder to Lana and Ember.
- Becky pushes Sasha off the ladders, but she does a Meteora to Charlotte and Natalya.
- Uh, that briefcase is up real fuckin' high. Lana sets up a way bigger ladder, with a sense of joy on her face.
- Natalya powerbombs Sasha into the ladder, causing a lot of mayhem.
- Alexa Bliss has done a lot of nothing involving the ladders in this match. She eats a Machka Kick and an Accolade. It is never a mistake to break one's back and make them humble.
- Naomi leaps onto the ladder and ALMOST gets the case. Considering she seems to win everything, I was sold on this.
- Alexa tries to push Charlotte and Becky off a ladder, but Charlotte survives in time to eat a Backstabber. Then Sasha's face gets crushed into the ladder by Naomi.
- Charlotte spears Ember into a ladder in the corner, but gets suplexed by Becky. Alexa tilts Becky off the ladder onto another one and wins.
- Based on recent history, it's a way to keep her out of everything creatively, beat her a lot, and still have her "have heat."
- Kurt Angle is overjoyed while talking to Paige backstage. They're joined by Constable Corbin.
Roman Reigns defeated Jinder Mahal (w/ Sunil Singh)
4.25/10
- Roman Reigns, already a heel according to WWE's company line, getting CM Punk chants against super babyface Jinder Mahal.
- Sunil Singh all of a sudden is healed. It's a miracle! He attacks Reigns.
- We get Rusev Day chants. Let's go Cena, Cena sucks. NXT. This match sucks. Velveteen. Boring. This is awful. All those chants.
- A chinlock. Yeah, that'll turn this crowd.
- Roman Reigns isn't the champion. Hasn't been for years now. Him being booked as the champion isn't the problem. His character being frustrating is the problem. The Strowman feud was a breath of fresh air because it provided something different.
- A couple of boots are traded, then Mahal gets a fireman's carry gutbuster for two.
- Don't call this a "polarizing" crowd. It's not. It's indifferent. That's where they are with these two characters. People are indifferent. Not invested.
- Reigns sets up for the spear but gets kicked and sent into the post. Mahal bleeding from the cheek.
- Reigns does a guillotine style legdrop and a Drive By. Singh tries to interfere, but gets caught and Superman punched, but the punch actually misses. The spear doesn't though.
- Jinder gets a small package for two, but eats a spear for three.
- This sucked. That would have been an okay Raw match. It didn't work.
- Joe A'noai isn't getting booed. Roman Reigns is getting booed. They aren't working anyone.
Smackdown Women's Championship
Carmella (c) defeated Asuka
6/10
- Asuka hits Carmella really hard with her ass and a sliding knee, but Asuka is pulled into the ring post.
- Carmella applies an armbar/head scissors combo.
- Carmella goes for a big kick, but Asuka catches it. The crowd is behind her as she hits Carmella with her ass again.
- Asuka scores some strikes but tumbles to the outside when going back to the ass well. Asuka is also kicked off the apron and takes a nasty bump to the outside.
- Carmella with a suicide dive!
- Asuka gains control in the ring after a really great exchange, but gets distracted by another Asuka! IT'S THE BIG HOG JAMES ELLSWORTH.
- Big kick and a pin from Carmella.
- Carmella did a suicide dive. Does that mean the "internet" will love her? Is that how it works? WWE pre-show said it was.
WWE Championship
Last Man Standing
AJ Styles (c) defeated Shinsuke Nakamura
7/10
- AJ Styles has the 15th most combined days as WWE Champion. His current reign of 222 days is 20th longest ever.
- Nakamura sends Styles into the diamond plates, then hangs Styles over the apron and knees him. He follows up with a flying stomp.
- Styles and Nakamura fight into the audience and Nakamura kicks Styles leg when he jumps to the barricade.
- Styles catches Nakamura off the top with a dropkick. Nakamura tries to hit Styles RIGHT IN THE PENIS, but misses and eats a Pele. Kind of.
- Nakamura hits the reverse exploder after Styles misses the sliding elbow, then walks into a forearm. Styles follows with an Ushigoroshi.
- Styles has a forearm stopped and gets thrown onto an announce table. For some reason Nakamura does a Kinshasa on the tables. Why?
- Styles almost powerbombs Nakamura onto a table that Nakamura set up, instead goes ribs first onto it. Then Nakamura heaves Styles through.
- Styles manages a Calf Crusher, and Nakamura taps. No dice. Styles takes a chair to Nakamura's leg instead.
- Nakamura begs off, but gets beaten down bad with a chair. He keeps getting up and begging. His facial expressions are great.
- RRRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT IN THE PENIS. Kinshasa follows.
- They brawl on top of the table, and Styles forearms Nakamura. A Styles Clash off the stairs to the floor!
- RIGHT IN THE PENIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS. Phenomenal Forearm through the announce table.
WWE Raw Women's Championship
Ronda Rousey defeated Nia Jax (c) via DQ (no title change)
7.25/10
- There's a lot of responsibility on Nia Jax tonight.
- She immediately takes it to Rousey and hits her with the sqiusher after a couple of tosses.
- Nia goes for the Samoan drop, but Rousey grabs a double wristlock, and transitions into a triangle attempt. Nia powerbombs out of it.
- Rousey fell out of the ring, she was selling ans stumbling. She gets powerbomb swung into the barricade for two.
- Nia Jax press slams Ronda, who gets up and guillotines Nia. Jax slams Rousey on a sunset flip attempt.
- Aw c'mon now. Nia Jax stealing Jordynne Grace's shit. Nobody brought the bearhug back before her.
- A FILTHY looking Samoan Drop hits, and Rousey kicks out. Rousey triangles Nia over the ropes!
- Rousey hits a flying body press, and sells it great. She then does an insane judo throw that gets a huge pop. She applies the armbar but almost pins herself.
- They put her in with a champion twice her size and established that there were a lot of aspects that were out of Ronda's grasp. I think having her armbar everyone in 15 secs after we've seen her lose twice is a way to get her the opposite reaction. She's showing what she can do.
- An armbar is applied but Alexa Bliss runs in and attacks both with the briefcase. This was a great way to not have Rousey win the title.
- Nia Jax was a great opponent for Rousey and worked her ass off
WWE Raw Women's Championship
Alexa Bliss defeated Nia Jax (c) to become WWE Raw Women's Champion
- DDT. Twisted Bliss. Alexa Bliss wins.
Men's Money in the Bank Ladder Match
Braun Strowman defeated Kevin Owens, Kofi Kingston, Bobby Roode, The Miz, Finn Balor, Rusev and Samoa Joe
6.5/10
- Balor has new gear, Aiden English has Chicago inspired gear.
- Why wouldn't all three guys just stay ringside and fight the participants? They say they're not cheaters, but damn.
- Kofi is in the match.
- Apparently, everyone listened to Owens, because they all attack Strowman. They stack ladders on top of him at the top of the ramp, and Miz tries to climb the ladders.
- Rusev fallaway slams KO into ladder. Kofi goes for the Trust Fall spot but is (KIND OF) caught, but Balor comes over the top with a tope con hilo onto everyone!
- That Balor/Strowman spot was great. Balor grabs one of the ladders on Braun, but Braun has the other end of it.
- Braun tosses KO off a GIANT ladder into a bunch of tables in one of the craziest spots in ages.
- Braun kills Kofi with a chokeslam on a ladder, then RUNS THROUGH another ladder as a terrified Miz looks on.
- A Staccolade is on Roode and Kofi, then Miz too! Joe comes up and applies the Coquina Clutch, but gets Machka kicked. Rusev is knocked off the ladder by Miz.
- A lot of those "tilt them off the ladder into the ropes" spots tonight.
- Balor does a Coup de Grace on Roode off the ladder. Braun powerslams Joe, then Miz.
- Strowman has Kofi on his back, on top of the ladder. He gets thrown off. If I'm Kofi Kingston, I smack the production member who missed that spot.
- Braun Strowman wins.
- So Braun's likely the one who know has the excuse to have almost nothing creative until he cashes in.